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May 23, 2014

Everything is irresistible. I’ve just been taught not to spoil myself, ergo my reluctance to interact.

Floating on my back through a river, watching several routine scenes.Seasons. Days.

Joyful nuances. Heavy noises.


Attention spans matter in youth. They stay on one topic half the day. Proving themselves.

Sometimes I have to wave goodbye to intricate mental functioning, open the door out, and become extroverted until I need to grab an artifact to play around with.

Fear of becoming stupid. – Invalid.

Powerful mindsets- I feel raw experiencing them.

Therefore, I feel wounded around others for that reason, and I sterilized myself by ignoring, but that passion still is within me.

And that passion is mine.

And frankly, I don’t know what is wrong and right.

And misinterpretations are known to run deep, not just within a person, but also within yourself. Budding Flower Blooming.

I feel like I’m going through some unique mental cleansing. The weird thing is I knew. I knew that there was something when I was smaller. And it’s sad. It’s like putting a hot rod next to my soul. Extracting energy. That energy increasing as the pain passes and the rod’s pulled away.

Is there something that gains even more energy as you take it away?

What a weird ability. Its not easily explained. It doesn’t fit into the margin.  Its like a dream. And now I’m just going to have to back up. Because perhaps I can’t stay within this mindset too long. But atleast I understand myself a little bit more, and I can construct what I have lost.

                     I need discipline.


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